The Depressed Christian

What is wrong with me? That is the question I continued to ask myself throughout my high school years. I wasn’t aware of all of the symptoms that went into depression or if I was even depressed at all. I know that despair was the deepest feeling that I possessed regularly. The feeling never took a break, and I never  got a break from it until it was gone.  According to the American Psychological Association (2023) depression is a disorder that causes egregious despair for extended amounts of time, that can inhibit how an individual operates on a daily basis. Eventually, I learned how to navigate my life with depression. I still made great grades, I still managed to take as many AP classes as I wanted to, I still got into all of the universities I wanted to go to, but still l was in despair daily. As a christian, it never made sense to me that I was potentially depressed. For a long time, I equated depression with a lack of faith. Because of this I never addressed my feelings to the Lord with the intention of him fixing it. I thought it was my circumstance to change. Before I continue I think it’s important to emphasize that depression is a mood disorder. The American Psychiatric Association views depression as a serious medical illness.

“Despite the negative views and opinions held by many mental health professionals, research examining religion, spirituality, and health has been rapidly expanding—and most of it is occurring outside the field of psychiatry. This research is being published in journals from a wide range of disciplines, including those in medicine, nursing, physical and occupational therapy, social work, public health, sociology, psychology, religion, spirituality, pastoral care, chaplain, population studies, and even in economics and law journals. Most of these disciplines do not readily communicate with each another, and their journal audiences seldom overlap. The result is a massive research literature that is scattered throughout the medical, social, and behavioral sciences.”

Vulnerability

Understanding Vulnerability: The key to vulnerability starts at an individual's understanding of the importance of vulnerability. For many Christians, Vulnerability is not necessarily a requirement for their walk. Maintaining God as Lord is something we crave by nature of the relationship. We want to lose responsibility for our hardest burdens and we want God to answer our prayers within moments of a prayer being prayed. However, receiving God as your father, which is the nature of Christianity, can be hard for people to fully engage in this relationship, when they don’t understand the need for vulnerability in the relationship. It's important that the nature of this relationship between God and us as Christians is viewed as a parent child relationship. 1John chapter 3 verse 1-2 says,” Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not. 2Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; The for we shall see him as he is.”(cite here). Although many scriptures emphasize the paternal nature of our relationship, there seems to be a lingering trend throughout the lives of many Christians that causes people to hide their flaws from God like they do their earthly parents. However our emotional relatability with our parents will be the same emotional relatable we initially have with God. In general Vulnerability expert, Brené Brown says, “Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection.”(Brown, 2010)

Mindfulness

The complexity of mindfulness creates a navigation for improvement in many aspects of life. Many scientist and medical scientist are looking towards mindfulness as a means towards the reduction of anxiety and mind fluctuations. Often Mindfulness is used as a meditative practice. However, this article is drawing regard to mindfulness as a distinctive approach to being still. Physical stillness is not always  required for mindful living; moreso the absence of lackadaisical movements throughout life. A foundational study done in 2008 explains one of the five aspects of mindfulness as "Non-reactivity to inner experience is the tendency to allow thoughts and feelings to come and go, without getting caught up in or carried away by them” (Baer et al., 2008, p. 330). Self improvement is a relatable goal that most people can relate to in most capacity. The beauty about this practice is that is creates opportunity for people to also grow in community of like minded people. Often, compassion is the side affect of practicing stillness during an interaction with another person. According to psychologist mindfulness are also major influences on a persons behavorism “Mindfulness and compassion have synergistic and distinct positive effects on ethical sensitivities. Given that both compassion and ethical sensitivities have roots in mindfulness, mindfulness interventions might be one possible venue to enhance these positive aspects of individuals’ psychology.”(Miller & Verhaeghen, 2022). This practice tailors the path for self compassion; the final theme of this project.

Self Compassion

The nature of the Christian faith is one of virtue and meeting the mark. Many virtues are constantly enumerated into the minds of Christians throughout their spiritual journey. However, self compassion is often looked over as a means to helping Christians to meet the mark. In the frame of our faith we often forfeit self compassion for the sake of holiness. However, true holiness allows for compassion in the midst of rebuke. Christian psychologist Joshua Knabb (2019) wrote a book about compassion practices for Christians where he claimed , “Therefore, we need permission to include ourselves in the circle of our compassion. For Christians, the permission comes from Scripture—from the unconditional love of God. Unfortunately, our capacity to see God as unconditionally loving is tainted by our personal relationship history.”.  In some Christian circles, self compassion along with self love are viewed as means to a selfish end. In a study done evaluating Christians, and their view on counseling and self compassion determined that, “ …Christians with less of a sense of grace would also be more likely to display unhealthy psychological characteristics. Con-versely stated, higher levels of grace were associated with greater mental health. These results are, of course, pre- experimental, and thus do not imply cause and effect. This raises the question of whether persons who are less graceful and also forgiving to others are more likely to be in counseling because of this attitude, or whether they have experienced more hurt at the hands of others and thus struggle to be graceful, leading to counseling.”(Watson et al., 2011). Compassion is the antecedent to forgiveness, and it plays a vital role in a healthy-natured individual. It promotes balance to see the world as it is instead the world shaping or perception. The science behind self compassion explains that ”It appears that self-compassion promotes soothing, “hypo-egoic” (Leary, 2012) responses to negative outcomes that reduce threat system activation and depressive symptoms.”(Johnson & O’Brien, 2013). Overall, Self Compassion is one of the most mindful practices a that promote the Christian faith.